Dealing With Growing Freedom & Growing Separation From Team Dark Influences

The quoted material below is from Carlos Castaneda’s book, The Active Side of Infinity (1998). Carlos Castaneda “departed his definitive journey in 1998”. December 21, 1998, the Sun reached the exact halfway point within the overall Galactic Alignment process. It reached the center or midpoint of the entire Galactic equator space. Many Volunteers/Forerunners/Pathpavers were physically, biologically activated in 1998 and 1999. Carlos Castaneda’s birthday was December 25th. Some left their physical bodies at that time, certain others were physically activated at that important energetic point to more fully enter them. At the end of this long and incredibly important cosmic and galactic transit, our Sun is coming out the other side of having approached, conjuncted, crossed, passed over and is now exiting that conjunction to the entire Galactic equator space in 2017. All of this material is related of course and still ongoing. Anything in bold in the quoted material below was done by me to draw attention to it in relation to the evolutionary Ascension Process and Embodiment Process we’re living.

 

 

“…I did see some strange fleeting black shadow projected on the foliage of the trees. It was either a shadow going back and forth or various fleeting shadows moving side-to-side or straight up in the air. They looked like fat black fish to me, enormous fish. It was as if gigantic swordfish were flying in the air. I was engrossed in the sight. Then, finally, it scared me. It became too dark to see the foliage, yet I could still see the fleeting black shadows.

“What is it, don Juan?” I asked.

“[Long ago, the native sorcerer/shamans of Mexico] discovered that we have a companion for life,” he said, as clearly as he could. We have a predator that came from the depths of the cosmos, and took over the rule of our lives. Human beings are its prisoners. The predator is our lord and master. It has rendered us docile; helpless. If we want to protest, it suppresses our protest. If we want to act independently, it demands that we don’t do so.”

It was very dark around us, and that seemed to curtail any expression on my part. If it had been daylight, I would have laughed my head off. In the dark, I felt quite inhibited.

“It’s pitch black around us,” don Juan said, “but if you look out of the corner of your eye, you will still see fleeting shadows jumping all around you.”

He was right. I could still see them. Their movement made me dizzy. Don Juan turned on the light, and that seemed to dissipate everything. Don Juan said, “You have arrived, by your effort alone, to what the shamans of ancient Mexico called the topic of topics. I have been beating around the bush all this time, insinuating to you that something is holding us prisoner. Indeed we are held prisoner! This was an energetic fact for the sorcerers of ancient Mexico.”

Why has this predator taken over in the fashion that you’re describing, don Juan?” I asked. “There must be a logical explanation.”

“There is an explanation,” don Juan replied, “which is the simplest explanation in the world. They took over because we are food for them, and they squeeze us mercilessly because we are their sustenance. Just as we rear chickens in chicken coops, gallineros, the predators rear us in human coops, humaneros. Therefore, their food is always available to them.”

I felt that my head was shaking violently from side to side. I could not express my profound sense of unease and discontentment, but my body moved to bring it to the surface. I shook from head to toe without any volition on my part. I heard myself saying, “No, no, no, no. This is absurd, don Juan. What you’re saying is something monstrous. It simply can’t be true, for sorcerers, or for average men, or for anyone.”

“Why not?” don Juan asked calmly. “Why not? Because it infuriates you?”

“Yes, it infuriates me,” I retorted. “Those claims are monstrous!”

“Well,” he said, “you haven’t heard all the claims yet. Wait a bit longer and see how you feel. “I’m going to subject you to a blitz. That is, I’m going to subject your mind to tremendous onslaughts; and you cannot get up and leave because you’re caught. Not because I’m holding you prisoner, but because something in you will prevent you from leaving while another part of you is going to go truthfully berserk. So brace yourself!”

There was something in me which I felt was a ‘glutton for punishment’. He was right. I wouldn’t have left the house for the world; and yet I didn’t like one bit the inanities he was spouting. Don Juan said, “I want to appeal to your analytical mind. Think for a moment, and tell me how you would explain the contradiction between the intelligence of man the engineer, and the stupidity of his systems of beliefs; or the stupidity of his contradictory behavior. Sorcerers believe that the predators have given us our systems of beliefs; our ideas of good and evil; our social mores. The predators are the ones who set up our hopes and expectations, and dreams of success or failure. They have given us covetousness, greed, and cowardice. It is the predators who make us complacent, routinary, and egomaniacal.”

“But how can they do this, don Juan?” I asked, somehow angered further by what he was saying. “Do they whisper all that in our ears while we are asleep?”

“No, they don’t do it that way. That’s idiotic!” don Juan said, smiling. “They are infinitely more efficient and organized than that. “In order to keep us obedient, meek and weak, the predators engaged themselves in a stupendous maneuver- stupendous, of course, from the point of view of a fighting strategist; a horrendous maneuver from the point of view of those who suffer it. They gave us their mind! Do you hear me? The predators give us their mind which becomes our mind. The predators’ mind is baroque, contradictory, morose, and filled with the fear of being discovered any minute now.

“I know that even though you have never suffered hunger,” he went on, “you have food anxiety which is none other than the anxiety of the predator who fears that any moment now its maneuver is going to be uncovered, and its food is going to be denied. Through the mind, which after all is their mind, the predators inject into the lives of human beings whatever is convenient for them. The predators ensure in this manner a degree of security to act as a buffer against their fear.”

“It’s not that I can’t accept all this at face value, don Juan,” I said. “I could, but there’s something so odious about it that it actually repels me. It forces me to take a contradictory stand. “If it’s true that they eat us, how do they do it?”

Don Juan had a broad smile on his face. He was as pleased as punch. He explained that sorcerers see infant human beings as strange, luminous balls of energy covered from the top to the bottom with a glowing coat something like a plastic cover that is adjusted tightly over their cocoon of energy. He said that that glowing coat of awareness was what the predators consumed, and that when a human being reached adulthood, all that was left of that glowing coat of awareness was a narrow fringe that went from the ground to the top of the toes. That fringe permitted mankind to continue living, but only barely. As if I were in a dream, I heard don Juan explaining that, to his knowledge, man was the only species that had the glowing coat of awareness outside that luminous cocoon. Therefore, he became easy prey for an awareness of a different order; such as the heavy awareness of the predator.

He then made the most damaging statement he had made so far. He said that this narrow fringe of awareness was the epicenter of self-reflection where man was irremediably caught. By playing on our self-reflection, which is the only point of awareness left to us, the predators create flares of awareness that they proceed to consume in a ruthless, predatory fashion. They give us inane problems that force those flares of awareness to rise, and in this manner they keep us alive in order for them to be fed with the energetic flare of our pseudo-concerns. There must have been something in what don Juan was saying which was so devastating to me that at that point I actually got sick to my stomach.

After a moment’s pause long enough for me to recover, I asked don Juan, “But why is it that the sorcerers of ancient Mexico and all sorcerers today, although they see the predators, don’t do anything about it?”

“There’s nothing that you and I can do about it,” don Juan said in a grave, sad voice. “All we can do is discipline ourselves to the point where they will not touch us.

“How can you ask your fellow men to go through those rigors of discipline? They’ll laugh and make fun of you; and the more aggressive ones will beat the shit out of you… and not so much because they don’t believe it. Down in the depths of every human being, there is an ancestral, visceral knowledge about the predators’ existence.”

My analytical mind swung back and forth like a yo-yo. It left me and came back, and left me and came back again. Whatever don Juan was proposing was preposterous, incredible. At the same time, it was a most reasonable thing; so simple. It explained every kind of human contradiction I could think of. But how could one have taken all this seriously?

Don Juan was pushing me into the path of an avalanche that would take me down forever. I felt another wave of a threatening sensation. The wave didn’t stem from me, yet it was attached to me. Don Juan was doing something to me, mysteriously positive and terribly negative at the same time. I sensed it as an attempt to cut a thin film that seemed to be glued to me. His eyes were fixed on mine in an unblinking stare. He moved his eyes away, and began to talk without looking at me anymore.

“Whenever doubts plague you to a dangerous point,” he said, “do something pragmatic about it. Turn off the light. Pierce the darkness; find out what you can see.” He got up to turn off the lights. I stopped him. “No, no, don Juan,” I said, “don’t turn off the lights. I’m doing okay.”

What I felt then was a most unusual, for me, fear of the darkness. The mere thought of it made me pant. I definitely knew something viscerally, but I wouldn’t dare touch it, or bring it to the surface, not in a million years!

“You saw the fleeting shadows against the trees,” don Juan said, sitting back against his chair. “That’s pretty good. I’d like you to see them inside this room. You’re not seeing anything. You’re just merely catching fleeting images. You have enough energy for that.”

I feared that don Juan would get up anyway and turn off the lights, which he did. Two seconds later, I was screaming my head off. Not only did I catch a glimpse of those fleeting images, I heard them buzzing by my ears. Don Juan doubled up with laughter as he turned on the lights.

“What a temperamental fellow!” he said. “A total disbeliever on the one hand; and a total pragmatist on the other. You must arrange this internal fight, otherwise you’re going to swell up like a big toad and burst.”

Don Juan kept on pushing his barb deeper and deeper into me. “The sorcerers of ancient Mexico,” he said, “saw the predator. They called it the flyer because it leaps through the air. It is not a pretty sight. It is a big shadow, impenetrably dark, a black shadow that jumps through the air. Then, it lands flat on the ground.

“The sorcerers of ancient Mexico were quite ill at ease with the idea of when it made its appearance on Earth. They reasoned that man must have been a complete being at one point, with stupendous insights and feats of awareness that are mythological legends nowadays. And then everything seems to disappear, and we have now a sedated man.”

I wanted to get angry and call him a paranoiac, but somehow the righteousness that was usually just underneath the surface of my being wasn’t there. Something in me was beyond the point of asking myself my favorite question: What if all that he said is true? At the moment he was talking to me that night, in my heart of hearts, I felt that all of what he was saying was true, but at the same time and with equal force, I felt that all that he was saying was absurdity itself.

“What are you saying, don Juan?” I asked feebly. My throat was constricted. I could hardly breathe.

“What I’m saying is that what we have against us is not a simple predator. It is very smart and organized. It follows a methodical system to render us useless. Man, the magical being that he is destined to be, is no longer magical. He’s an average piece of meat. There are no more dreams for man but the dreams of an animal who is being raised to become a piece of meat: trite, conventional, imbecilic.”

Don Juan’s words were eliciting a strange, bodily reaction in me comparable to the sensation of nausea. It was as if I were going to get sick to my stomach again. But the nausea was coming from the bottom of my being, from the marrow of my bones. I convulsed involuntarily. Don Juan shook me by the shoulders forcefully. I felt my neck wobbling back and forth under the impact of his grip. The maneuver calmed me down at once. I felt more in control.

“This predator,” don Juan said, “which, of course, is an inorganic being, is not altogether invisible to us as other inorganic beings are. I think as children we do see it, but we decide it’s so horrific that we don’t want to think about it. Children, of course, could insist on focusing on the sight, but everybody else around them dissuades them from doing so. The only alternative left for mankind is discipline. Discipline is the only deterrent. But by discipline I don’t mean harsh routines. I don’t mean waking up every morning at five-thirty and throwing cold water on yourself until you’re blue. Sorcerers understand discipline as the capacity to face with serenity odds that are not included in our expectations. For sorcerers, discipline is an art; the art of facing infinity without flinching; not because they are strong and tough, but because they are filled with awe.”

“In what way would the sorcerers’ discipline be a deterrent to the flyers?” I asked.

Don Juan scrutinized my face as if to discover any signs of my disbelief. He said, “Sorcerers say that discipline makes the glowing coat of awareness unpalatable to the flyer. The result is that the predators become bewildered. An inedible glowing coat of awareness is not part of their cognition, I suppose. After being bewildered, they don’t have any recourse other than refraining from continuing their nefarious task. If the predators don’t eat our glowing coat of awareness for a while, it will keep on growing.

“Simplifying this matter to the extreme, I can say that sorcerers, by means of their discipline, push the predators away long enough to allow their glowing coat of awareness to grow beyond the level of the toes. Once it goes beyond the level of the toes, it grows back to its natural size. The sorcerers of ancient Mexico used to say that the glowing coat of awareness is like a tree. If it is not pruned, it grows to its natural size and volume. As awareness reaches levels higher than the toes, tremendous maneuvers of perception become a matter of course.

“The grand trick of those sorcerers of ancient times was to burden the flyers’ mind with discipline. Sorcerers found out that if they taxed the flyers’ mind with inner silence, the foreign installation would flee, and give any one of the practitioners involved in this maneuver the total certainty of the mind’s foreign origin. The [alien mind control of these creatures] comes back, I assure you, but not as strong; and a process begins in which the fleeing of the flyers’ mind becomes routine until one day it flees permanently.

“That’s the day when you have to rely on your own devices which are nearly zero. A sad day indeed! There’s no one to tell you what to do. There’s no mind of foreign origin to dictate the imbecilities you’re accustomed to. My teacher, the nagual Julian, used to warn all his disciples that this was the toughest day in a sorcerer’s life for the real mind that belongs to us. The sum total of our experience after a lifetime of domination has been rendered shy, insecure, and shifty. Personally, I would say that the real battle of sorcerers begins at that moment. The rest is merely preparation.”

I became genuinely agitated. I wanted to know more, and yet a strange feeling in me clamored for me to stop. It alluded to dark results and punishment, something like the wrath of God descending on me for tampering with something veiled by God himself. I made a supreme effort to allow my curiosity to win. I heard myself say, “What-what-what do you mean, by taxing the flyers’ mind?”

“Discipline taxes the foreign mind no end,” he replied. “So, through their discipline, sorcerers vanquish the foreign installation.”

I was overwhelmed by his statements. I believed that don Juan was either certifiably insane or that he was telling me something so awesome that it froze everything in me. I noticed, however how quickly I rallied my energy to deny everything he had said. After an instant of panic, I began to laugh, as if don Juan had told me a joke. I even heard myself saying, “Don Juan, don Juan, you’re incorrigible!”

Don Juan seemed to understand everything I was experiencing. He shook his head from side to side, and raised his eyes to the heavens in a gesture of mock despair. He said, “I am so incorrigible, that I am going to give the flyers’ mind which you carry inside you one more jolt. I am going to reveal to you one of the most extraordinary secrets of sorcery. I am going to describe to you a finding that took sorcerers thousands of years to verify and consolidate.”

He looked at me, smiled maliciously, and said, “The flyers’ mind flees forever when a sorcerer succeeds in grabbing on to the vibrating force that holds us together as a conglomerate of energy fields. If a sorcerer maintains that pressure long enough, the flyers’ mind flees in defeat. And that’s exactly what you are going to do; hold on to the energy that binds you together.”

I had the most inexplicable reaction I could have imagined. Something in me actually shook, as if it had received a jolt. I entered into a state of unwarranted fear, which I immediately associated with my religious background.

Don Juan looked at me from head to toe. “You are fearing the wrath of God, aren’t you?” he said. “Rest assured, that’s not your fear. It’s the flyers’ fear, because it knows that you will do exactly as I’m telling you.”

His words did not calm me at all. I felt worse. I was actually convulsing involuntarily, and I had no means to stop it.

“Don’t worry,” don Juan said calmly. “I know for a fact that those attacks wear off very quickly. The flyer’s mind has no concentration whatsoever.”

After a moment, everything stopped as don Juan had predicted. To say again that I was bewildered is a euphemism. This was the first time in my life ever, with don Juan or alone, that I didn’t know whether I was coming or going. I wanted to get out of the chair and walk around, but I was deathly afraid. I was filled with rational assertions, and at the same time I was filled with an infantile fear. I began to breathe deeply as a cold perspiration covered my entire body. I had somehow unleashed on myself a most godawful sight: black, fleeting shadows jumping all around me wherever I turned. I closed my eyes and rested my head on the arm of the stuffed chair.

“I don’t know which way to turn, don Juan,” I said.

“Tonight, you have really succeeded in getting me lost.” Don Juan said, “You’re being torn by an internal struggle. Down in the depths of you, you know that you are incapable of refusing the agreement that an indispensable part of you, your glowing coat of awareness, is going to serve as an incomprehensible source of nourishment to, naturally, incomprehensible entities.

“And another part of you will stand against this situation with all its might. The sorcerers’ revolution is that they refuse to honor agreements in which they did not participate. Nobody ever asked me if I would consent to being eaten by beings of A different kind of awareness. My parents just brought me into this world to be food, like themselves, and that’s the end of the story.”

Don Juan stood up from his chair and stretched his arms and legs. “We have been sitting here for hours. It’s time to go into the house. I’m going to eat. Do you want to eat with me?”

I declined. My stomach was in an uproar.

“I think you’d better go to sleep,” he said. “The blitz has devastated you.”

I didn’t need any further coaxing. I collapsed onto my bed, and fell asleep like the dead.

[When I arrived] home, as time went by, the idea of the flyers became one of the main fixations of my life. I got to the point where I felt that don Juan was absolutely right about them. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t discard his logic. The more I thought about it, and the more I talked to and observed myself, and my fellow men, the more intense the conviction that something was rendering us incapable of any activity or any interaction or any thought that didn’t have the self as its focal point…”

“…The next time I saw him, I instantly jumped to talk about the flyers. I said, “I have tried my best to be rational about this subject matter, but I can’t. There are moments when I fully agree with you about the predators.”

“Focus your attention on the fleeting shadows that you actually see,” don Juan said with a smile. I told don Juan that those fleeting shadows were going to be the end of my rational life. I saw them everywhere. Since I had left his house, I was incapable of going to sleep in the dark. To sleep with the lights on did not bother me at all. The moment I turned the lights off, however, everything around me began to jump. I never saw complete figures or shapes. All I saw were fleeting black shadows.

“The flyers’ mind has not left you,” don Juan said. “It has been seriously injured. It’s trying its best to rearrange its relationship with you. But something in you is severed forever. The flyer knows that. The real danger is that the flyers’ mind may win by getting you tired and forcing you to quit by playing the contradiction between what it says and what I say.

“You see, the flyers’ mind has no competitors. When it proposes something, it agrees with its own proposition, and it makes you believe that you’ve done something of worth. The flyers’ mind will say to you that whatever Juan Matus is telling you is pure nonsense, and then the same mind will agree with its own proposition, ‘Yes, of course, it is nonsense,’ you will say. That’s the way they overcome us.

“The flyers are an essential part of the universe, and they must be taken as what they really are; awesome, monstrous. They are the means by which the universe tests us. We are energetic probes created by the universe,” he continued as if he were oblivious to my presence, “and it’s because we are possessors of energy that has awareness that we are the means by which the universe becomes aware of itself.

“The flyers are the implacable challengers. They cannot be taken as anything else. If we succeed in doing that, the universe allows us to continue…”

Just because this book was published in 1998, doesn’t mean that’s when Castaneda had these experiences and interactions with with don Juan. They may have happened decades earlier, and if I weren’t so tired at the moment I’d check this more carefully. Point is, that many of the terms used in this information are decades old, some very ancient, so it may be helpful to replace some of them with terms we’re more familiar with in today’s Ascension Process (AP) and the Forerunners Embodiment Process (EP).

If you replace the term sorcerers with Forerunners, Volunteers, Starseeds, Blue Rays, Pathpavers, Lightworkers, Lightwarriors of the AP, this information makes more sense. If you replace the term flyers and predators with Archons, negative aliens, negative entities, demonic beings, parasites, Team Dark etc., then this information makes more sense.

If we think of the term discipline used here instead as Soul Contract(s) and/or Soul Missions etc., then some of this information makes more sense in what many of us have experienced with these and other inorganic Team Dark (TD) beings. If we translate sorcerers, through discipline, push the predators away long enough to regrown their glowing coat of awareness to, Forerunners living the AP and now EP long enough to gain and embody greater amounts of Divine Source Light and LOVE Energies, then this information makes more sense.

If we swap-out the terms taxed the flyers’ mind with inner silence, the foreign installation would flee, to intentionally energetically removing TD and their parasitic influences by deliberately and constantly dedicating oneself to one’s current evolution to “ascend” through and then beyond Duality Consciousness and reality, to Unity or HighHeart Consciousness and reality to be free of them and that lower frequency range of reality and consciousness.

If we understand that the alien mind control of these beings comes back, but not as strong, and a process begins in which the fleeing of the flyers’ mind becomes routine, until one day it flees permanently to, you Forerunner, you seeker and embodier of Source Light and LOVE struggling to evolve and ascend the lower levels, will repeatedly be attacked by TD to stop you, derail you, prevent you, or simply exhaust you from doing exactly that. Keep going, never look back, never stop because you are so very close now and soon you’ll be out of range of all of them permanently.

“The flyers’ mind flees forever when a sorcerer succeeds in grabbing on to the vibrating force that holds us together as a conglomerate of energy fields.” Change that terminology to something like, when a Forerunner accumulates enough higher frequency Light Energies in themselves and their physical bodies, they evolve beyond lower Duality and enter higher frequency Unity or HighHeart and begin becoming increasingly Sovereign individually, and TD simply cannot reach those higher levels. If a sorcerer maintains that pressure long enough, the flyers’ mind flees in defeat.” For Forerunners and Embodiers this means that once we’re able to maintain energetic Sovereignty individually and not “fall” back down into old lower levels of frequency, reality, consciousness and emotions etc., not let ourselves be manipulated by any negative TD being(s) or Portal Person human(s) and do this long enough, we successfully cutoff the food and fuel supply from ourselves to TD and they leave us alone; they flee in defeat.

The next thing I want to finally talk about, after going through this in very amplified ways constantly since 2014, is “the flyers’ mind is still with you, it’s been damaged but it’s trying it’s best to rearrange its relationship with you.” I’ve experienced this increasingly every year since 2014, and still am today and will be for a while longer I suspect. And, from what I’ve heard many of you fellow Forerunners say to me in emails and Comments is that you too are, in 2017, just about all… done… with… everything AP related. Believe me, I understand. However, yep there’s a however here, this is that powerful and important point within all of this, or any other Great Initiatic Process, where you’re so freaking exhausted from it all that you just want to lie down and sleep for as long as you can get away with. I remember reading one line in one of Castaneda’s books back in the mid-1970s that hit me like a ton of spiritual bricks because I knew it was true and profoundly important. It had to do with “being impeccable” constantly, no matter what you’re doing or not doing. You could be sitting on your butt staring at the ceiling, but you’d better be doing so as an impeccable being otherwise you’ll probably get knocked to the floor! Once an Initiate, always an Initiate in other words, and there’s no being lax, careless or unaware once you’ve reached a certain level of awareness and energy. And in this lifetime of Galactic Alignment and the AP and EP, many of us incarnated with this fully functioning from birth; others were Coded to have it re-activated at some point within our AP in this lifetime.

What am I really talking about here you may be wondering at this point? How many of you Forerunners have thought about and/or are currently dealing with what life and reality is going to be like once you’re actually free of TD? What are you going to do? What do you really want? What are you going to create? How many of you, especially the Elder Forerunners who’ve been at this most or all of their lives already, are currently exhausted yet bored out of your ever-loving skulls? How many of you are, like I’ve been, having to re-learn how to function and exist without all the TD bullshit negativity and endless interference, parasitism and manipulations? Said another way, some of us are and have been for a few years now having to incrementally learn how to, as don Juan put it, “The flyers are the implacable challengers. They cannot be taken as anything else. If we succeed in doing that, the universe allows us to continue…” Some of us are currently standing, make that teetering on the blissful and hard-earned threshold of the universe allowing us to continue, and we’re a bit dazzled by that fact, not to mention really tired and feeling like we’ve been isolated for far too long. Some of us are looking at the endless possibilities that lay before us, debating what we want to invest ourselves and our Sovereign energies in at this early stage of our and the Process. At the moment, I just want a nap and to come back to this thought after I’m more rested. How about you?

I can clearly see, feel and hear the growing chaos of the old lower patriarchal world below me, but I’m not directly (that’s a keyword there) affected by it at this point. I’ve gotten some altitude in other words as have most (but not all) of you reading this, but the old lower world is eating itself now in 2017 and the energetic pull is wild, frantic and determined to continue at all costs and it still tries to “rearrange its relationship with you”. Old habits die-hard for both sides but don’t stop doing what you always have because you’re so very close to being really free of it all finally. ❤

Denise

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Copyright © Denise Le Fay & HighHeartLife, 2017. All rights reserved. You may copy and distribute this article so long as you don’t alter it in any way, the content remains complete, credit is given to the author(s) and this URL https://highheartlife.wordpress.com and Copyright Notice is included.

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The Slow Merging of Higher & Lower Selves in the Physical Body & Incarnate Self

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There’s been periods throughout 2016 when I knew my physical body and DNA were rather dramatically evolving again. My first human thought usually is if any of these weird changes I’m feeling are age related, and no doubt some of them are, however most are added changes due to it being the third 9 energy year (2016) within the Ascension Process and Galactic Alignment.

heart icons 12I’ve been very aware of some of these changes because the way my physical body responds to certain things, usually emotional things, is wildly different from anything I’ve experienced in my life. The first time I felt this was early in my physical, biological Ascension Process around 2000. I was driving and my Mom said something funny and I laughed out loud. Nothing unusual about that except that I was instantly shocked by the dramatically increased amount of energy in me and my body when I laughed. To me it felt and sounded HUGE and I was surprised, confused and slightly embarrassed by such amplified force blasting out of me through my laughter. I’d never felt that before because it had never existed before and it was a really startling change.

After some time I realized that what I’d felt, and from my perspective heard, was a tremendous increase in the amount of energy I had within my physical body, and when I laughed it felt and sounded massive and unusually loud and powerful. It took some getting used to this sudden change in how much “voltage” I suddenly had running through me and my physical body back in the early days of the Ascension Process. Of course this Process has never stopped or ended since then, but continued and increased in the amount of Light Energy I (and you reading this) was consistently taking on and embodying as I energetically climbed these many evolutionary Ascension Stair-steps over the years and decades.

heart icons 12Decades ago my Mom told me the story about when I was a baby all she had to do was lay a blanket on the floor, put me in the middle of it, and I would not leave the blanket. After she told me this, I told her why I didn’t leave the blanket and it was because I was afraid to and would not crawl out into the “world” because I knew from infancy where I was and how unsafe life on 3D Earth really was. That’s a difficult burden to carry from infancy and not have it crush or break you in any way(s). The only other person I’ve read talk about being consciously aware of where they had incarnated is Inelia Benz, and she said she cried uncontrollably for days before their family doctor had to sedate her. My personality—plus my conscious memories of many Team Dark “monster” beings—has been to go into stealth mode so the “monsters” of this world and beyond hopefully wouldn’t notice or sense me down here, quietly immobile on my blankie! Scream and cry and make a lot of noise and commotion? Not me, I’d do everything I could to become invisible and literally fly under Team Dark’s (TD) radar as much as I could get away with for as long as I could. That is why I never left the blanket as an infant. Different story the older I got however because, like it or not, I was/am a ‘Volunteer’ and I had/have a job to do while incarnate here during this very important Ascension Process and evolutionary shift out from under those very “monsters”.

heart icons 12Another important life awareness and early memory I’ve had since age two or three years, was a time when my Mom and Dad were driving the three of us somewhere. Keep in mind that this was back in the early 1950s and baby carriers and car seats etc. didn’t exits. Because it evidently was a longer than usual drive we were taking, Mom had laid my crib mattress in the back seat of the car, covered it in blankets and surrounded it with protective pillow barricades for me. It was my own little travel “nest” in the back seat of their car.

At some point during this drive I felt a never before experienced emotion and physical body sensation that was powerful enough to cause a two-year-old to remember and recognize it for life. What I suddenly felt was an all-encompassing sense of safety, security, empowerment, peace, physical comfort, emotional comfort, spiritual comfort and HighHeart memory of and direct sensations of with Higher nonphysical HOME. It was blissful in those rare moments, those highly unusual feelings of being utterly safe, protected, nurtured, loved, LOVED, comfortable and consciously aware that I was a multidimensional being that existed simultaneously in higher and lower frequency dimensions and “realities” while being very young Denise incarnate in physicality, again.

I’m stressing how real this was on both emotional and physical levels because I, as Denise, had never felt safe, secure or comforted being reincarnate on physical 3D Earth now! The profound extremes between feeling like constant prey in the Dark physical Land of Evil Monsters, and, feeling that Divine Source had my back was a terrible, lovely, disturbing contrast, especially for a very young child. But, such are the lives, experiences and awareness of most Forerunners/Starseeds/Wayshowers/Higher Frequency Beings of Light in what’s been incomprehensibly negative and Dark for so very long.

universalheart5I’ve mentioned many times how very difficult life has been for me since early 2014, and 2015 wasn’t any improvement either but more about dealing with all the changes caused by my Mom’s sudden 2014 stroke and subsequent worsening dementia. Things, situations, places, people and ways of life have been winding up, winding down, imploding, exploding, falling away, disappearing and dying and all of it has been part of this Ascension Process. A few days ago I was reviewing the years from 2014 to now, the end of 2016, and it’s honestly been hard to grasp in its entirety. 2014 and 2015 were wild years of sudden and dramatic change and I know this isn’t remotely over yet. December 2015, the first energy “Wave” of that year began for me very differently from all previous Ascension Process years and decades. Last December 19, 2015 I suddenly felt like I had a seven foot-long spear going through my physical body at and through the upper chest area at the HighHeart. Needless to say it was amazingly painful as my HighHeart and surrounding area went through greater evolutionary changes.

I’ve often been able to clairvoyantly See the different evolutionary higher Light energies coming into this dimension and my physical body as lines of Light. Back in 1999 and the early 2000s, I could See these different lines of Light coming into my body and/or my head in very specific angles and degrees, somewhat like laser lines of evolutionary Light, that needed to enter the body and/or specific organs and chakra areas etc. in highly specific geometric angles. Some of these lines of Light would connect with another line of Light, usually at endocrine glands but not always, again in highly specific angles and directions etc. that were intentional, not random or accidental. I’m not very familiar with Chinese acupuncture and meridian lines in the human body etc., but what I’ve clairvoyantly Seen over the decades of these Ascension Process lines of Light entering my body and head have reminded me of a type of Divine geometric Light  “acupuncture” energies let’s call it, that further activates certain DNA to evolve, change and expand at specific times and so on. Said another way, these very high frequency evolutionary lines of Light enter us, our bodies and consciousness, our body “grid”, our consciousness “grid”, our emotional HighHeart “grid” so to speak, at specific angles and directions that are sixth dimensional (6D) and geometric.

So if you too have clairvoyantly Seen a line or lines of Light energies coming into your body and head at clearly defined angles and intersecting with other lines of Light, then you know that there’s a higher blueprint being followed and overlaid on and within us and we call it compressed evolution. If you can See it, it’s rather stunning in its perfection and clarity despite how often it makes us feel! Lead to Gold…

Since November 2016 I’ve had this same sensation of a seven foot-long spear (line of Light) going through my HighHeart, upper chest area of my physical body. My beloved cat partner entering his death process and suddenly dying last month didn’t make that any easier to endure and things have felt like unseen bombs have continuously gone off left and right, red and blue, light and dark ever since. Put quiet simply, it’s been really horrible in multiple ways for a long time now. Like I needed to even say that to the people reading this! 🙄

universalheart5Having said all that I need to quickly add that off and on since December 2015, I’ve very much felt this growing sensation in me and my physical body that clearly lets me know that tremendous evolutionary progress is being made in between the explosions and pains of our current lives. Like my experience as a two-year-old in my little “nest” in the backseat of my parents car, I have been clearly feeling that old familiar sensation of HOME now in me, in my physical body, right here, right now. This is, from my current perspective and level of awareness, the ongoing merging of my Higher Self with my Lower Self in Denise’s physical body and incarnational timeline during this Ascension Process. Hot damn kids, we’re doing it! 😀

So far to me this ongoing merging process feels like increasingly being at ease, at peace, empowered beyond belief, safe, comfortable, in love/LOVE with self and Self and Source because they are all One within me and my physical and energetic bodies and evolving consciousness. So too for you reading this but it probably feels a bit differently to you and that’s normal and to be expected.

But, if you’re also feeling a strong and constant growing inner sensation of being comfortable in your skin; of growing personal Sovereignty; of increasingly being out of range of TD and their influences; of not being able to relate to the old world or have any interest in it whatsoever other than to put it out of its misery once and for all, then you’re feeling the merging of your Higher & Lower Selves taking place IN you and your body and HighHeart. And yes it’s blissful, timeless, and yes it is crazy painful sometimes but who cares because it’s happening, for real! Higher HOME is here now—in the early stages—in many of us and it’s why there are those moments of timeless bliss and hanging with Source because Source and Self are merging and becoming One within each of us. Just imagine what reality will be like with hundreds of thousands or millions of Source-as-Self connected Sovereign human Light beings living and creating on 5D Earth.

universalheart5  All this sounds so wonderful, and it is, and yet this cusp-like, transitional between two worlds and levels of being, consciousness and reality really gets to be way too much sometimes. Off and on all year I’ve had more periods where I was so not of this world feeling and functioning that it was all I could do to go out into it and forage for groceries and toilet paper and have to actually physically speak to another human being! Off and on all year I’ve had times where I couldn’t string a sentence together well enough to communicate with a physical human. Typing is easier thank gawd but this is no way to have to exist, this half-in and half-out sort of business. This I AM Divine Source yet I still have to interact with repulsive unaware humans existing and functioning in old lower TD’s frequency range and are totally mind controlled and not to be trusted for a second. How long can this insanity and tension-filled gaping gap continue? Not long because I don’t want to do it for starters. Another big shift is close now thankfully because it’s impossible to be in bliss while driving your car or interacting with a cashier somewhere just like it’s nearly impossible to have to interact with unaware humans that honestly believe they’ve got it all figured out, are so clever and powerful and think you’re easy prey. Give me strength to be Neutral and unaffected by the silly shit in all its diverse forms…

There’s a lot going on now as we all knew there would be at the end of this third 9 energy year of completions. I’ve had to spend a lot of time almost every day laying down doing nothing and being very still while this merging continues. It will get easier but until it does, rest often, sleep whenever you need to no matter what time of day or night it is, eat what and when your body needs the fuel, be alone while this massive spiritual, energetic and physical evolution unfolds in you and your body, always move among the human zombies with Higher Awareness, and radiate your Light like crazy around the humans waking up and feeling their HighHearts birthing within them now. 2017 will be tons more of this for many more people so be ready for it and much more as best as you can. ❤

Denise

December 7, 2016

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